Welcome breast cancer sisters, family and friends. We hope to make this chapter of your life a little easier, treatment less difficult, help families cope, provide inspiration and guide you to a new place of strength and purpose.

Not Tonight Honey. My Feet are Cold.

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Did you know cold feet could make it harder for some women to orgasm? I didn’t know that until Dr. Laura Berman, a highly regarded professor, researcher and sex therapist, dropped this life-changing tidbit on Oprah.

According to several studies, the key to female arousal is deep relaxation and lack of anxiety, and you can hardly be relaxed if your feet are always cold. In my case, and numerous other breast cancer survivors I’ve spoken with, my feet are not simply cold. They are usually freezing. Not even socks can warm my feet. It takes nothing short of a heating pad.

As a result ofchemotherapy, many breast cancersurvivors wind-up with chemo-induced peripheral neuropathy, or nervedamage. Areas adversely affected can be the brain, which isalso known as chemo brain, along with a loss of sensation in the toesand fingertips, even to the point of being numb, and cold feet is awell-known and common side effect.

Since other medical conditions like diabetes, alcoholism, traumatic injuries, infections, nutritional deficiencies, as well as some medications, can also cause peripheral neuropathy, who knows how many women are plagued by the same problem? Because I had eight rounds of chemotherapy, I wondered if Dr. Berman’s statement about cold feet and orgasms applied to me, and maybe to some of you, but short of Dr. Berman, who do you talk to about something like this? Since I am your trusty lab rat, the answer is me!

When I told my husband I was going to experiment with a heating pad, he looked at me kind of quizzically, and then said, “OK. If you insist. But I’m just going along with this in the name of science.” Yuk, yuk… lecherous grin. Bottom line? Warm feet make all the difference in the world.

I’ve since graduated from literally keeping my feet wrapped in a heating pad during sex, which can make for some insanely funny moments that kind of ruin the mood, to turning the heating pad on high and wrapping my tootsies until they’re nice and toasty, then throwing it aside. Of course that approach takes the spontaneity out of sex. Perhaps medical science needs to develop a pill that rushes blood to women’s feet, hopefully making them warmer, and lasting for a 24-36 hour period, giving us the flexibility of Cialis. On second thought, how about a pill that warms our feet and brings us satisfaction at the same time?

We are a nation mired in technology and inventors. We can read the license plates on a speeding car from outer space, and my blow dryer has a more sophisticated microprocessor than some computers I’ve owned. Is it really asking too much to warm my feet AND increase my libido at the same time? I read somewhere that footwear made of leather has insulating properties that help keep our feet warmer. Hmm… Maybe I should just buy a pair of high-heeled, black leather boots that zip up the side. Now there’s a look most men would go for. Oh, honey… I have another experiment.